Archive for the ‘Random thoughts…..’ Category

Hey! I have a crush on you!!

for the record, that's Bellatrix!

for the record, that’s Bellatrix!

College life: these super fun-filled moments of laughter, these super busy days with assignments and projects…friends and nicknames, classes and bunks, canteen, the bus-stop! Life seems so awesome. It’s like we have everything now… but time: to stand and stare! Amidst these busy times, we undoubtedly gather the best moments of life! That calling me Bellatrix for the super-awesome hair that I have got, that fighting for the Best Cultural Team Award, those till-dawn hours of coding in the moments just before project submission! Everything becomes a cherished memory, something that we wish to preserve for the rest of our lives. Seriously, these are the best days of my life (as yet). And amidst this, THAT one person that you have this huuuuuuuuuge crush on! That one smile that makes your heart skip a beat. It’s funny how he can make you smile: yeah, with no reason at all!! And the guilty pleasure in stealing a glance of him. Haha! It’s funny though! And isn’t that always tempting? That stolen glance; that one dance that you almost prayed God for! Yeah, I was tempted to have a dance with him! Silly as it is sounds! But you know what the best part is? I did get to dance with him! Not in the ideal ball-dance kinda way, but yeah, the crazy DJ-night dance in the college technical fest does work too! Haha!

remember!? haha!

remember!? haha!

Yeah, temptation it is: for an unexplainable beauty that it has in it. Probably because of the fact that it is always like that staccato flute that you hear late at night. You don’t hear it start, you don’t clearly know when it ends, but that little piece touches your soul… is incompleteness really that beautiful? Probably yeah, isn’t Monalisa also an unfinished work? Personally, I like incomplete. It always has that hope…the hope for a better ending, the perk of imagination and the ecstasy of framing and reframing scenes of probability… Regards, PS       This post is for Write Over the Weekend, an initiative for Indian Bloggers by BlogAdda (Prompt: the post must contain ‘I was tempted’.)




So, here comes another new year! Another chance to exchange smiles, another excuse to hang out, drink and enjoy life! Another reason to wish family and friends, and convey our best wishes, in an otherwise busy life…and again, another chance to give a new start, to have new hopes, new dreams and aspirations! Another chance to see life with new perspectives, another chance to look at the world through both our eyes…

Happy New Year Everyone! Wish you a very successful, happy and peaceful year ahead. Another year passed, I do not really know what adjective would rightly befit the year 2013 for me. Well, the year was full of lots of ups and downs: many lessons learnt and many taught Winking smile  a year with some big mistakes, some big decisions, some big realisations, and to sum up, some great experiences. 2013, thank you man! I had some great turning points in my life…and life is going to be sooooo much different here after. Some so…bitter experiences, some so…ugly hearted people! But at the end, it doesn’t matter, what does matter, is that I moved on, and that’s the zing about life isn’t it? No matter what, it will always go on! In short, the year twenty 13 was no lesser than a roller-coaster ride for me. It was great altogether!

So here is my resolution for 20-fourteen: I will move on, and be as awesome as possible!

Yeah, it does sound funny I agree, but after 21years of making resolutions like “I will get up early in the morning! BAM! I will stick to the time table strictly, BAM! BAM! I will learn to cook goddamn well! And yet another BAM! The BAM’s may go on and on! So now, since I’m little close to understanding myself, I realise what I am really gonna be devoted to, from heart! Yeah, I will be as awesome as possible (perhaps another Barney Stinson, who knows haha! Open-mouthed smile ) Well…..jokes apart, let’s see what 2014 has in store for me. And for an annoyingly optimistic person like me, I cannot help but hope for the best!

Happy New year guys!

And don’t forget to be awesome Rolling on the floor laughing!



India will awake to life and freedom…!

At the stroke of the midnight hour, when the world sleeps, India will awake to life and freedom. A moment comes, which comes but rarely in history, when we step out from the old to the new, when an age ends, and when the soul of a nation, long suppressed, finds utterance. It is fitting that at this solemn moment we take the pledge of dedication to the service of India and her people and to the still larger cause of humanity. –Pt. Jawaha lal Nehru.

Happy 67th Independence Day to all Indians!

1st independence day

Independence- the word that is simply impossible to completely define. As it is like an empty canvass- we all see what we want to see. Some see peace, some vacancy, some see honour, purity and the capability to define or design it any way he wants! Such a blank canvass is this independence to me—we all see what we want to see it as.

Today, it is our 67th independence day. A day we all Indians are proud of, no matter how much upset we are with its political situation or economic status. A day which makes us all thank our fore-fathers for having fought a battle that had almost taken their lives. For having restored the beauty that Bharat had always deserved. And it makes us remember those awesome heroes who fought and kept fighting for the country’s honour: be it before 1947 or after, be it in the struggle of Independence, or in the war of Kargil; be it in the LOC, or in any other rebel that they fought to save another Indian. We are all proud of them, and no matter how much frustrated you are, if you are an Indian, you just cannot but be proud of it. That is simply what we are… that’s us, the Indians.

But are we really independent? Many of us claim that had there been British Rule in India for a little while longer, India would have risen to being a developed country. We praise those disciplined and sophisticated people for having given India the bliss of so many beautiful architectures, even for introducing the language that I am writing in, right now. Many of us say we were better off with their rule, India would have been more beautiful, more built, more developed, more ornate. Perhaps it might be true. After all, even the Parliament is a British gift to us. Their unparalleled devotion and discipline is yet another factor that always charmed me too, to honestly admit. Perhaps if they really did rule us now, the rate of crimes would have fallen either. The corruption, the illegal scams, the mute politicians who serve some royal families more than they should be serving our motherland, the illiteracy rate, the laziness of some pathetic people, the dignity, the disrespect and wail-full situation of women in India, perhaps every such thing would have ceased, or at least lessened. Perhaps India might have woken to more beautiful mornings, or heard more enchanting compliments or had some brighter nights. But, the question is-‘Would Indians have felt or got the same too??’ Am I not correct

when I say that “the real status and beauty of a country lies in the status and beauty of its people”?? No doubt India would have seen some more beautiful mornings and some even brighter nights, but would India have been happy, when she sees Indians treated the way they were treated by the British?

Today, India is a free country, only bound to her children like she always was. But for Indians, are we really free? Are we not bound to some immoral culture? Every day the pages of newspapers suffocate us with the ugly reality of today—the corrupted officials, the scams, the mournful deaths of beautiful Indian girls when they are raped? The list is endless. Today, Indians are free, but they have misunderstood the meaning of freedom. Freedom is not something that makes you do whatever you want, it is not something that allows you to go bonkers after money and wealth, it’s not something that frees you off the sisterhood of an Indian girl, to look at her with the eyes of a cannibal. Have we forgotten our Pledge today? Does it not say all Indians are my brothers and sisters??? Or have we forgotten ourselves today?? In a world where being ‘no strings attached’ is in vogue, shouldn’t we be ashamed of being ripped off our own souls and consciences allowing us to do what we do today? We blame politicians and higher officials for this and that, and I do not say they do not deserve to be, but how often do we blame ourselves??

We still wait for that midnight hour to come, when India will actually rise into life and freedom; when we step out from the old rotten customs of poverty and immoral inhumanity in to the bond of brotherhood and the bliss of development. When each Indian brother will keep the pride of his Rakhi-dhaaga; when India will be free of corruption, muted selfish politicians, un-ending desires of greedy wants; when on every Independence, an Assamese like me will be free to enjoy the Independence of India at KFC and Dominos like we celebrate each other’s birth days; rather than being trapped in my own home with the fear of being killed? When we will be the Nation every true Indian dreams of. And that day, my friends, can only come when you, I and every Indian swear to work genuinely towards it.


What a beautiful morning it must have been, the 15th of August 1947!

What a beautiful nation it must have been then, too. When every Indian knew what it meant to be an Indian, knew the importance of freedom and the meaning of slavery. Unlike many of us, who rather choose to be the servants of greed, anger and selfishness, that being the king of his own and the possessor of a beautiful conscience?

Happy Independence Day, India.


A Proud Indian.

Click here to read the Complete Speech on Independence Day Speech– Pt. Jawaharlal Nehru

This post is a part of Write Over the Weekend, an initiative for Indian Bloggers by BlogAdda


It took me a little time in deciding what I’d post in this theme; I went through my albums again and again. I did find a few pictures that rightly befitted the theme ‘layer’, but the scrutinising board of my mind did not let any of those images to pass. I looked over these pictures- it had layers for sure, but what was it that my heart couldn’t accept them?


my entry for PADE #6

The layer of those houses which are homes or even heavens to the ones who reside there, the layer of green which makes our survival possible…the layer of vacancy—that gives us what we intake in every breath, and those beautiful layer of illusive clouds, which gives a bud of deceptive imagination to almost every one born on the earth. In short, my brain said—this pic has life, it has the cause of life, imagination, and the genuine truth of air that proves the presence of something real, right in front of our eyes still which we are incapable of seeing—it screams in its inaudible voice the truth we may take a life time to learn- not what we see is true always, not what we don’t see is untrue always. In short, I found my thoughts wandering in every dimension from this pic. Still my heart did not say it was complete.


And for this picture, the layers of silence, the layers of mightiness, the layers of what forms our home planet—revealing and unrevealing tales of existence…, leading from one side to another (it is a cave).

Still my heart fixed with an incomplete sigh.!

I looked up in the dictionary-the meaning of layer. And it said nothing that I didn’t know of.


I browsed my laptop for pictures, just then I found this-

And my heart skipped a beat—so many layers, all together, is it even possible? Or was it my eyes deceiving me again? The layer of un-comparable beauty of an Indian bride, the veil of shyness, the layer of fear, nervousness of what the life after this day beholds, a concealed layer of happiness for getting married after 10 years of love, the pride, the sadness in her eyes for leaving the home that she grew up in…and many more I cannot even feel.

And it is only now, i feel that the post about ‘Layer’ is complete, these three pictures define what layer means to me, however, if I have to choose only one for PADE, I’d nominate the first pic, though the last pic toouches my heart, still photography wise, I think the first deserves it more. 🙂

This post is a part of PADE, a 31 day photo challenge wherein each participant will post an image according to the theme of the day. To know more about is, click here.


PADE–Picture a Day Experiment

“It isn’t surprising when we want to touch the clouds of sky, we all do that. But it is, when we see those mighty clouds escape through the spaces between our fingers…

There is a strange thing about distance- often, the more distant it is, the more likely it is to attract, and when we actually diminish it into a hand’s reach distance, we find out that all we had been chasing so long was nothing but smokes of illusion aboding within our imagination, just like these clouds….”

I took this picture last year in a place better known as the Scotland of India- Meghalaya ; and truly is, the abode of clouds. The smokes seen in the picture are actually clouds, and that thin trail of white is a fountain.
Enchanting truly!

This post is a part of PADE, a 31 day photo challenge wherein each participant will post an image according to the theme of the day. To know more about is, click here.

this click won me the “Shutterbug of the day badge !!!!” yeayy!!A-PADE-Shutterbug-badge.jpg

Rain and The Irony of Life

rain1On a rainy day like this, when the air is filled with that scent of wet soil, I see her take some time to close her eyes and feel the air that rushes in… I see her look outside the window, slowly extending her hand and feeling the shower between her fingers. I see her smile when those little drops touch her skin and dance away beyond vision… I smile.

There! I see them dance, I see them sing, and I see them pull one another to feel the mesmerising craze. I see him holding her hand, and smiling contently as he looks up.

I smile now. For, it is immensely beautiful to be the smile on her lips, to be the music of their dance; to be the excuse of his contentment. And, for a moment it makes me forget about the pain of separation, and it makes me forget about my increasing distance from him. He sees her wet hair and those pearl like drops on her face, and calls her beautiful; and I take pride in myself. I made her feel beautiful! I laugh now.

And then when the friendly wind makes me go here and there, teasing me with its changing directions, I dance that inclined dance. I rush down, hither and thither, with all smiles and dances.

A crazy laughter can take you to a heaven. And those little children! They make you forget you aren’t a child. So I dance my way down, rushing and wetting everyone on my way.

But then when I fade away with the last drops falling on the earth, it makes me weep. For it makes me realise-not every happiness lasts long, not every dance goes on forever, not every laughter echoes endlessly. And then it makes me miss him even more. What an irony! I roll down away from the sky, so that I can keep meeting him again, we bid goodbye to each other so that we can greet again, we separate because we want to be together, forever. rain4

And the people around me, they don’t even realise my pain, they are just happy to see the beauty of nature enrich on its own.

What an irony indeed! What is grief for one, is happiness to some other; what is failure to one, is victory of another, what is end of one, is beginning of another.

And I wait here, hiding beneath their footsteps, counting down time, waiting to melt away in your arms, as I accept every tear with the hope of smiling again…rain2_thumb.jpg




Because pictures are some perfect pasts!!

I am at home now. Practically wasting away my time, laughing loudly at almost anything that would otherwise have deserved nothing but only a smile. Vacations do energise you up don’t they? After a long semester in college, trying to relate all those P’s to all those N’s, jamming up my brain with 1’s and 0’s, what’s much more called for, is a vacation at home where you can resume your animal-self again : to keep the child inside you alive and happy.

So today, when I woke up at 11am (I know that’s late as hell, but I guess am allowed isn’t it? I am at HOME!!! Open-mouthed smileSmile ) Okay, coming back, so today, before I even had my breakfast, I happened to grab an album which had kept embraced within itself, the memories of a great childhood, and some deliciously happy moments that are always so much fun to re-live, yet again. Pictures are really very beautiful, aren’t they? Especially because of the obvious fact that they never change, even when the ones in the picture, the moments get weathered and the smiles fade away. Still they remain the same, enclosing the moments within its transparent bars.

Let me add here a quotation that seems to befit-

“Old pictures look very rugged and young, and the people in the photographs always seem a lot happier than you are.” -Perks of being a Wallflower.

Well may be it’s a fact, may be it’s not. But it seemed to match my emotions a lot. (Though am not really sure about the ‘happier than you are’ part.)

I started rummaging my brain for words today, not merely to write about ‘pictures’, but to share with you those few photographs which had left me feeling a lot nostalgic and happy today; and left a few thoughts knocking on my brain cells.

So, here I go-

I found few photographs from school, and at once it started coming back to me… the fights, the uncontrolled laughter, the competitions of this and that; and what not!

I found this pic of my besties together with me, and we look soooooooo not the ‘today’s us’. LMAO. I immediately ‘WhatsApp’ed my bestie the pic and the reply came- OMG! Where did you get it? Surprised smile seriously we look so dumb and ugly.

buli dui

“It’s easier to floss with barbed wire than admit you were that someone in middle school.”
― Laurie Halse Anderson, Speak (a li’l edited )

What an irony. Scoring an 18 or 19 out of 20, getting a Second Position in those extra-curricular competitions could gloom my face like a pumpkin. And these now seem so un-important. I guess that’s life. And that’s human nature- considering one self’s present problems as the ‘all in all’.

These are two more pictures of my childhood which somehow managed to engrave in my mind again.

On the left is a picture from the day I had danced for the first time in school. I am the girl on the second position from left who looks more like a boy. Yeah, that’s me. And from that day, to the day I passed out from that school- there were so many other performances, so much other fun, still this pic remains the special one for all time.

buli paaas

“it’s back to school time. or as home-schoolers call it, stay-where-you-are time.”
― Stephen Colbert

buli sari~2

“Growing up is losing some illusions, in order to acquire others.”
― Virginia Woolf

And the other pic, the one on my right is from the time I had danced the 7-sisters’ dance if I am not wrong. The costume is nice, isn’t it? I guess I was the one representing Nagamese culture, and my friend, well I am not sure which state she was from, that day.

It’s queer because if someone asks me to wear that dress and perform in front of the same audience, I’d hesitate. Now I’d be more shy and uncomfortable, unlike the care-free and jolly girl I used to be. Well this, I guess is called growing up! You can’t always be crawling on floors and suckling your fingers can you?

buli pic

“And I have one of those very loud, stupid laughs. I mean if I ever sat behind myself in a movie or something, I’d probably lean over and tell myself to please shut up.”
― J.D. Salinger, The Catcher in the Rye

Here, look at that! And that crazy person showing how-big-her-mouth-can-open is sadly, me. Had it been someone else, it would have been even more fun blogging about it, but sadly that, I kept for another day. Well, hopefully!

I mean, look at it! What was seriously wrong with me that I opened my mouth into that big a cave: showing proudly my missing tooth even. And the rest in the pic, they all look so sober, so calm. And me- like I have been thunder struck, or am from some other planet. And what’s even bigger a joke is that- I can’t even remember what it was that made me burst into that Ravan-laughter.

buli tini

Siblings. Nature’s way of creating a slightly (or very) different version of us.

Here it is: me and my brother. We have always been that inseparable pair who are more likely to be each other’s extensions of their own self, rather than being two different individuals. We are that mischievous pair that used to fight like Tom & Jerry but still remained intact like Timon & Pumbaa. And this picture reveals both – he having my samosa and giving that victorious I-won-smile and me, I don’t know why I am showing my teeth that much even here. Well may be in a way Stephen Chbosky was right, the people in the picture do appear happier. But whatever it is, this is yet another one of my favourite pics of all times.

And there it is-finally a not-so-bad picture of mine. I seriously thought I won’t find any.

buli soy

“This is my carefree, this is my freedom–this is MY HAPPY.”
― Coco J. Ginger

So there it is-my childhood at a glance. I became so damn super excited to see all these pictures that I immediately WhatsApped him these snaps. And yes! I did not forget to add my current picture at the end- to make sure he doesn’t feel too bad about dating an Oggie. LOL.

And yes, please don’t forget to add your responses; I’d be more than glad to know if even one of them pricked that tickling bone of yours.